The appeal of a small church

Ward and I have been to MANY churches in the 9 years we've been together. We've attended services at Methodist, Presbyterian, Luthern, Episcopal, and Catholic churches. We've had good experiences and bad ones, but we finally found a church home about 2.5 years ago and we're so happy. Our church isn't that big (we regularly have about 200 in attendance each Sunday), but it's big enough that it has plenty of "extra" activities. We participate in a Wednesday night fellowship, attend Sunday School, and go to "Big Church" each week and we're happy. We have made friends with several other couples who have young children and we enjoy getting our boys involved with the youth. We love this church and feel so warm and welcomed every Sunday and Wednesday.

There aren't many kids in the youth program at our church (I would say there are about 20 active kids between the ages of 4 and 12) but our church is really trying to ramp up these programs and attract younger families, without changing the Sunday service and overall "traditional" theme of our church. And I'll admit, they're struggling. It seems most young families today are choosing their churches based on the "extras" and so many of those "extras" seem to be more and more secular. We have a few Mega Churches in our town that offer literally 50-100 different types of activities or groups for you and your children to be a part of. They range from age-defined, to hobby-defined, to gender-defined. And while these social opportunities are great, it would never make or break our decision to join a church. But I'm finding out we aren't like most people.

We had just started making friends with a group of 30ish parents with kids under the age of 8...there were about 5-6 couples in our group. We'd sit together at Wednesday night fellowship and and our kids played together at other church functions and I was really starting to get to know them. We recently found out that 2 of the couples and their children have left the church for a mega church, and our closest friends at church have been secretly attending services at a Mega Church and will likely leave at the beginning of the year. Another couple in the group that have no children may not stay because they are related to one of the families leaving. It's down to just us and another family (from the original 6 families that hung out together) and they aren't attending church regularly anymore...maybe once every three weeks.

I'm so disappointed. I know there are other families we will get close to and hopefully other families will start joining the church, but I wish they would have stayed to give things a chance. It's so hard for the small church to compete with the Mega Church these days. I worry that small churches will end up folding because they can't stay afloat, and people will end missing the wonderful experience of belonging to a small church. I love that the older people in the church know who my kids are, know what activities they're involved in, and know what's going on in their lives. I feel we wouldn't have as much of that in a Mega Church, and it's very possible we'd only get to know a tiny percentage of the congregation.

Ward and I feel called to be a part of the development team for the Children's Ministries at our church, so it looks like that's another project I'm going to be working on this fall and winter. I hope we can help in some way.

Lord, give me guidance! :)

Teaching others about coupons

I have learned so much about couponing the past 2 years and I was happy to finally get to show a few other people how to save money the crazy way I do. I think they were a little overwhelmed at first because I use 5 blogs, Sunday inserts, EBAY, and All You magazine to get these savings...but I really think they're going to give it a whirl. I'm glad I've really spent some time entering all of the savings into a spreadsheet so I can review this at the end of the year and really see my savings.

Who knows, maybe I'll even start doing couponing workshops!

A trip to the movie theater

When I was in my teens, going to the movies was "the thing" to do. A group of us went almost every Friday night in junior high, and on Saturdays it was the place to go if you were a "couple". There weren't many movies I didn't catch at the theater from 1990-1995, and if I missed it at the theater, I could rent it for 99 cents at our local movie shop a few months later. Because of this, I developed a deep love for movies. I wanted to see every romantic comedy, everything that was nominated for an Oscar, and every Disney movie. This fact helps me so much when we are playing Scene It Movies or Trivial Pursuit.

However, once I got into college, I stopped going as much, and then when I got married and things were tight, we stopped going all together. Throw kids in the mix, and no one to babysit, and here it is 2010 and I've probably only been to the theater once a year for the past 10 years, and Ward has been less than that because I normally only go with my girlfriends.

Over Christmas, my mom came up with the great idea to go see a movie on Christmas Day, so we all went to go see "It's Complicated" with Meryl Streep and Alex Baldwin. I LOVED it and it made me miss going to the movies to much. It brought back so many memories. Luckily for me, a girlfriend asked me to the movies for this past weekend and were able to go see "Up in the Air" last night with George Clooney. I absolutely LOVED it and I'm so glad I went.

We had such a good time that we vowed to go to the movies together every other month. If we go on Sundays, it's only $7.95 per person. We can afford that! I was shocked to see that movie prices are up to $11.00 per person in my area. when I was a young teenager (just 20 short years ago) it was only $3 per person. My mom always gave me $5, which bought a small popcorn and a coke. My friend and I went to share a popcorn last night and it cost $19 for a large popcorn and two medium cokes. We about died. Why in the world is it SOOOOO expensive to go to the movies now????

We vowed to sneak our own cokes and candies in next time! :)

Playdates

Wally loves Legos and he has found a friend that loves them as well. They were in K5 together last year and saw each other at the baseball park this summer, but Wally's never mentioned him much as a friend he plays with at school. Until now. Now that his little friend, we'll call him "Eddie", has admitted to getting a few Lego sets for Christmas as well, Wally is all about having him over.

I wrote his mom a note last week and we have set up a play date for this afternoon. I'm serving lunch at the school today, and then I'll bring Eddie home with us afterschool. Before we go home, since it's going to be 60 degrees here today, I'm taking them to a big park on the lake here. Then we'll come home and have pizza and brownies for dinner, and then Ward is going to take Wally, Beaver, and Eddie to the batting cages.

I think I'll be exhausted by the time the night is over, but it's nice to be in that phase of parenting where you get to watch your children play with their friends one on one. I think Beaver's still a little bit young to set up a playdate, but at least Wally let's him play with his friends. He really is the best big brother ever!

Helping a friend in need

Sometimes when I look at my life, I don't realize how great we have it and how lucky we are to have each other. Ward is a great husband and father, we have a nice home, reliable transportation, clothing, food, and we're all healthy. I am thankful for those things and praise God often for giving us such a wonderful life, but there's one component that I forget about sometimes because it comes so naturally to me... Ward and I have a great marriage and are still very much in love. I guess I just assume all married couples with kids are happy, because on the outside, it usually looks that way. But I found out recently that looks can be very deceiving.

A new friend of mine (a mother at the school) rencently disclosed that her husband moved out and is living in the city 30 miles away. Her children are 5 and 7 and they were very confused and upset when she told them. My friend says that the marriage has had problems since day 1 and she's not "weepy" about the decision, but instead needs to focus on her responsibilities as a mother and just keep busy. I know she is overwhelmed right now with Christmas, church duties, school duties, and taking care of the children, so I offered to help her in any way I can.

Thankfully, she was comfortable enough to pass the torch on a looming church responsibility. She allowed me to help cater a church function for 75 people. I was happy to have the opportunity to expand my little "side business" and also to knock something off of her To-Do list. People are so self-sufficient these days that very often they don't reach out and ask for help. I'm so glad she did and I think our friendship will be strengthened in the process.

Think about your own circle of friends. Is anyone in need of some help, but unwilling to ask? Take the first step and offer to cook a meal for their family, help with laundry, or baby-sit their children. You might never know how much that could help someone.